Clinging

She feels the need to hate something but it's not fair to hate others just to hate. So she projects it onto herself. But she's happy now, happy with herself, so how do you hate what makes you happy? You don't, you destroy the happiness until all that's left is hurt. Because it's easy to hate something that hurts. But even then there's a little bit left, something to be happy about so she clings to it, never to let it g0. And that's good but it works the same with hurt an hate, she'll cling to it and never let go. With every smile she gives to someone that hurts her it grows, until she's left clinging to the happiness yet again.